A Special Balls Deep Message To The Class Of 2009 by Drew Magary
Excerpt:
I bet you grads had one hell of a spring, didn’t you? Oh, I bet you spent your whole spring taking a miniscule courseload, lounging on blankets outside on the quad, fucking each other, drinking your gay little Twisted Teas… I bet you even smoked pot on Wednesday morning, just for the hell of it. I bet you just had the time of your fucking lives the past four years, didn’t you?
YOU MAKE ME SICK.
Guess what, fuckos? Party’s over. You’re out of college now, and your parents are now too poor to nurse you through grad school. No more fantasy life for you. No more ice luges. No more intellectual discourse. No more ripe teenage pussy. That’s all over now. YOU ARE FUCKED.
Read the lot of it here.
Source: deadspin.com
